The Doug Ellingsworth Blog

Hey! Your Kid’s Brain Needs You.

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on September 18, 2015

My oldest daughter, a school teacher, brought this research to my attention a few years ago. The subject was stirred again recently in a discussion with a pastor’s wife.

The human brain, particularly the part that connects actions with consequences and influences impulsive behavior, is not fully developed until we are in our early twenties. (You can read a short article about it here, but there is plenty of research out there if you want to check it out.)

What that means is that your child may not be doing goofy things just because he is a rebellious teenager, but it could be because his brain won’t let him see the pain he’ll suffer if his plan doesn’t work. Things that are “no brainers” to us, are not so clearly defined in the minds of our kids.

Add to that the information that girls usually develop a little faster than boys and you can see why moms and dads are always wondering why Johnny can’t be as good as his big sister was when she was that age. That also explains why his insurance rates stay higher longer than his sister’s did.

But it also means something else.

Living/Ministry

An Unlikely Treasure

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on September 10, 2015

Unlikely treasures. I’ve got a few.

Like an old tin pirate’s toy chest with a rounded top. Not every pastor with an AARP card can boast of having one in his office, but mine sits under the window across from my desk. I can still recall the day in 1965 when my parents bought it at the old White Front store in Sacramento, California. Leaving the store, I cried because they didn’t buy me the Bible I’d seen there. Dad turned the car around and went back inside for that white Bible with the gold zipper. Yeah, I still have it, too. First Bible I ever owned. And the only white one.

I’ve got some unlikely treasures.

Leadership/Living

What I Observed By Watching

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on September 5, 2015

This has been a week folks will remember for a long time. People are filling their social media channels with their opinions about a court clerk in Kentucky who was tossed in jail for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same sex couples in response to a recent Supreme Court ruling that says homosexuals must be allowed to marry.

My biggest issue? We are a nation of laws. Our Constitution gives the power to make laws exclusively to the legislature. The President can’t make laws. The Supreme Court can’t, either.

Family/Leadership/Living/Ministry

So, Want To Know How We Got Here?

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on August 26, 2015

I’m not asking how we got to that nice little village in the picture. It is obvious we got there by bicycle.

What I’m inquiring about is how we got to where men wear skirts, children choose their own gender, everybody uses the same bathroom, and we’re supposed to think that’s all cool.

We aren’t there, you say? You don’t see this where you live? A writer from London mentioned that while attending a fashion show in New York a few weeks ago. This is how she ends the article: “Laugh at the idea of (men wearing) a thigh-high split dress at your peril. You could be wearing it soon – if not this winter, perhaps the next.” It’s here. And it will only get worse.

So, how did we get here?

Family/Living

You Really Ought To Go To Church

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on August 19, 2015

When I was a kid, it never entered my mind to ask on a church night whether or not we’d be going. I was half-grown before I knew that staying home was an option. We sure couldn’t at my place. In fact, there were times I was permitted to miss school, but still had to go to church.

I recall a few times when my carpenter dad worked late. Mom would have us all ready and fed, and we had strict orders to make sure the bathroom (we only had one) was free the instant dad’s boots hit the front steps. He’d bathe and put on his suit and eat a Spam sandwich as he drove us to church. It didn’t matter if it was revival, work night, or regular Bible study. If there was church, we were there.

Living/Ministry

The Proper Response To Trouble

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on August 12, 2015

In my journey to become a crisis chaplain, the first lesson I recall being taught was to never minimize someone’s loss. As you gaze though your neighbor’s window, the death of her little poodle or the pink slip included in his last paycheck may appear to you as minor inconveniences, but to those experiencing them, they can be devastating.

What motivated Hannah to desperately beg for a child when, as part of the “deal,” she was so willing to give him away (I Samuel 1)? I know that she was placing him into the hands of the priests and little Samuel would be dedicated to serving the Lord, but Hannah would still be separated from him. It almost seems that she was praying for the experience of bearing a child instead of the joy of having a child to share life with.

Family

The Blessing In The Spanking

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on August 5, 2015

I know. Spanking is frowned on by many nowadays. But if today’s politically correct crowd sets your agenda, you are half a step from going crazy. Their values are not formed by a set of unchanging and proven principles, but are a collection of bizarre notions that defy logic. If a bakery does not want to cater a same-sex marriage, our government and mainstream media will shut them down, but if a business wants to sell pieces of aborted babies, our government will be their financial partner and the media will convince us they are providing essential medical services. Our Supreme Court says our Constitution demands that we all buy health insurance, and that same document, they say, won’t let its citizens define what a marriage is. So pardon me for not being impressed with this politically correct logic. It may be delivered in elegant prose by distinguished orators, but irrational nonsense is still irrational nonsense.

Having survived being spanked by my parents, grandparents, and a school teacher or two, I stand as a strong proponent of spanking.

Living

You Gotta Read The Old Testament!

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on July 20, 2015

You hear it occasionally. Somebody explaining that, since we live under the New Testament covenant, the only purpose the Old Testament serves is to help us understand history and to supply us with stories of faith. They point out that we no longer serve under the rules of the Law, so none of that is necessary for the Church to know.

That wasn’t the opinion of the first church leaders.

The Old Testament was the only Bible they had. Using the Old Testament book of Isaiah, Philip taught a government official about Jesus, and convinced him to be baptized. Paul used the book of Deuteronomy to prove that churches should pay the preachers that serve them (I Corinthians 9:9-10). He also told Timothy that those Old Testament scriptures would lead us to salvation through faith in Christ Jesus, and that they would make a man of God perfect, giving him all the tools he needed to fulfill his calling (II Timothy 3:15-17).

Jesus admonished men to search those Old Testament scriptures, saying that they testify of Him.

Family/Leadership/Ministry

From A Dad To His Pastor

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on July 17, 2015

I hope, Pastor, that you will not feel that I am being disrespectful by sending you this note. The truth is, if I didn’t have confidence and trust in your life and ministry, I wouldn’t bother to say anything. But because I do trust you, and because the Bible makes it plain that I need a pastor, I feel compelled to write.

My family is my dearest possession. Regardless of what I might accomplish with my life, if I fail to help them develop a strong bond with the God who made them, I’d consider myself a failure. Placing them in your spiritual care is not something that I’ve done without great thought and much prayer.

While I have confidence in your ministry, I’ve also had confidence in other ministers that I now see embracing behaviors that they once said were wrong. I’m not talking about a little adjustment here and there, but radical lifestyle changes.

Family/Ministry

When Dreams Die. Or Do They?

by Doug Ellingsworth @https://twitter.com/DEllingsworth on July 9, 2015

In the Summer of 1999, a young man, just finished with high school and looking forward to his college career, attended a youth service with some of his friends. In the middle of his sermon, the preacher suddenly stopped and said,”There is a young man here, already planning to go to college, that God is calling you to give up your plans and dreams and go to Bible college and serve Him.”

The boy did have plans and dreams. He loved working with computers, and after finishing college, that would be his life’s work.

But he felt the tug and call that evening. After a lengthy time of prayer around the altar, he went home and told his mother and pastor that God wanted him to go to Bible college.

College started in just two weeks. But in those two weeks, the young man was able to get admitted to Bible school, find the money to move a few hundred miles, and get all settled in. Although he was giving up his lifelong dream of pursuing a computer science degree, he was happy with his decision and was excited about his future.